No More Mediocre Days: How I Created a Life of Meaning & Magic

If you’ve ever felt trapped by your own life, this perspective shift will change everything

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When you’ve lived so many of them feeling as if you’ve lost or failed, you quickly become concerned with how you can set yourself up to experiencing a positive “winning” day instead. And as a mother living my particular reality, there’s a high chance that you’ve lived more than the average number of days that fall short of this ideal.

I never imagined that I would live so many days spent questioning, and even bargaining, the cards that I’ve been dealt just like I’m squarely situated in a classic phase of grieving. It never crossed my mind that I’d mother an infant who needed physical therapy, and that I would break down in tears on video during their sessions scheduled for telehealth due to the pandemic.

But, here I am. And there I was... BUT (to a certain degree) I have a direct say in where I’m going next.

And on the heavier days that press down hard across my shoulders and make my steps drag slowly across the floor, I remind myself of just that. But I don’t stop at just a simple mental reminder; I take the required time to hold space for arriving at belief that I do get to decide how I show up in this world, regardless of my surrounding environment.

When this fact becomes solidly irrefutable to me on a subconscious level, I frame the entire remainder of my day by it. I always know that whatever may happen to me does nothing to change this knowing. And honestly? It feels so divine and spacious go about my day with it placed securely in my heart.

I made the commitment to begin prioritizing my holistic wellbeing during this year, and that includes my mental space. So, I then like to do a little brief, but honest, inner-self-check to acknowledge just how I’m feeling at that moment and what the reasons why may be. And sometimes, just actually brainstorming why I’m experiencing whatever emotion there is in that moment gives me such remarkable clarity that it even feels like a physical relief.

And I remain gentle with myself when I bring awareness to what I’m really holding onto inside of myself. I don’t rush to immediately judge or frame it in any type of way for any reason. And knowing that I can expect this sort of safe-handling with my honesty makes that honesty come to me that much more easily... I’m rewarded with growing self-mastery, which is the beginning of all knowledge, and the positive effects just cascade down into every area of my being.

Armed with this knowledge, I then know how to better handle myself that day and perhaps even what to do when going about my day itself. I have made it my business to gently have any conversations that my new emotional clarity suddenly made important. I have also taken other actions, such as make certain purchases, visit different locations, and even eaten specific types of food all based on what happens to come up at those times.

I consider all of my day’s doings as “adventures” because I find that when I follow my authenticity and my intuitive nudges (as I have intentionally made a daily practice of mine to do), unexpected and serendipitous events happen to me all of the time… I have made who would become very close friends, discovered much-needed money just in time, and literally witness miracles happen. The types of events I’m describing are the ones that logic and even chance break down for. I believe that they’re intended just for me by something greater.

And in this way, I never once feel as if I’m settling for living a mediocre, by-default experience. I actually feel like I’m taking up the reins to control what is in my power to influence my day in a more positive way. I don’t just passively experience whatever happens to come my way as I trudge along uninvolved and disinterested… I feel empowered by truly living my life and even attracting more and more positive experiences that unfold for my ultimate benefit, sometimes in the most unexpected ways.

Having yourself a truly “winning” day can all stem from simply coming to the awareness that you, even as a special needs/autism mom, have the inner power to take an active role by getting to decide just how you show up in this life. Holding on to this knowing very tightly has developed into a real lifeline for me, especially during the times when my life is feeling more chaotic, uncertain, and overwhelming. This same opportunity is always waiting for you to seize.

There was a time when I believed that my life was simply happening to me, that I possessed no real agency in how my story unfolded. But through plenty of time spent in deep self-reflection, trial and error, and out of sheer necessity, I’ve learned that even in my hardest of seasons, I can still assume the role of an active participant in my reality.

Every day isn’t the perfect picture of everything coming together in easeful bliss. This is far from the truth. But having just the right perception can transform what was once pure reaction into appropriate responses to life’s happenings, instead. Where I could choose to settle for allowing a challenging morning to influence my mood and entire day in a negative manner, I can alternatively choose to reset, realign, and reclaim the energy I want to carry forward with me.

So, personally, I very consciously decide to keep showing up for myself. I keep choosing again and again to live my life with intention, to give myself grace during the times that I inevitably fall short of my aim, and to trust that even in the messiest moments of the day, there is meaning to be found if I’m willing to take the time to search for it.

And if you happen to be in a season of your life where it feels like your day is just happening to you and where control and clarity feel impossibly out of reach, please know this: You actually are not powerless... You are not lost. And you most definitely are not alone. You securely possess the remarkable ability and very real power to reclaim what is your story… And I promise you—step by step and choice by choice—it will change everything.

And how are you reclaiming your days lately? Or in which ways do you commit to reclaiming your story? Reply to this email or drop a comment below and share. I’d genuinely love to hear from you.

Until next time,

Cheniece ♡

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